The Evolution of My Name

When I was born, my mother's oldest, childless sister insisted that I be named Sarah Jane, after their long-dead mother. Mama agreed to Sarah but chose Marie for my middle name. I grew up hating that name -- only elderly ladies were named Sarah. I longed for a popular name like Linda or Brenda, ones that echoed in my classroom. I vowed that as soon as I got to be 18 and had $50 for court costs, I would legally change my name. However, when I reached 18, I'd grown comfortable with Sarah and could think of no name I wanted as a replacement. So, Sarah Marie White I stayed, until the late 70's, when I wrote several short stories, self-published a collection of poems and began scribbling at the pages of novel.

There I was - the granddaughter of a woman who could neither read nor write- determined to make my name recognizable in the print world. I decided to pay tribute to the grandmother I never knew by using her last name as my middle name. Thus, Sarah Bracey, the illiterate, would have her name listed as the author of books. To my surprise, thereafter, when I introduced myself to strangers using my new literary name, they invariably repeated it, "Sarah Bracey White, what a nice name. Memorable." I'd struck gold. Every writer needs a memorable name and I had one that carried historical significance.

In middle age, when the man I loved asked me to marry him, I once again pondered the subject of names. I considered adding his last name to mine - thus becoming Sarah Bracey White Gironda - but thought it made me sound like a law firm, instead of a person. I was loathe to part with any of the names I already had, and so informed my fiancé.

"I'll change my name to yours," Bob said. "It'll be easier to make reservations with White than Gironda. Everybody can spell and pronounce White.

" Touched by his gesture, I nixed that idea. Why should he change his identity for the comfort of reservation clerks? His business partners also discouraged that change by citing the disruption and expense involved in changing their logo, legal papers, business forms, etc. Bob agreed to keep his name and I kept mine. He did ask that I sign the name given on my birth certificate to our marriage license. "I want to be married to the real you," he said. As far as I was concerned, the real me is Sarah Bracey White.

"I don't use my husband's name" was my quick response to anyone who called me Mrs. Gironda during our early years of marriage. To me, Mrs. Gironda was my mother-in-law; her first name was also Sarah. A year ago, my mother-in-law died and many of the condolence cards from her distant friends came addressed to Mr. & Mrs. Robert Gironda. In my grieving, I accepted the mantle of Mrs. Gironda and have finally grown comfortable answering to strangers who address me as such. Yes, I'm still Sarah Bracey White, but on occasion, I'm also Mrs. Gironda. And on occasion, we get mail addressed to Bob and Sarah White or Mr. & Mrs. Sarah Bracey White. We open all of it.